Prostitution is the World's Oldest Profession
by AyumaKasaga
Summary: and Ash Ketchum, my dear reader, is a professional. oneshot, lime. palletshipping and slight leagueshipping.


It was the middle of November in Celadon City. It was chilly, but not unbearably so. A breeze blew by, carrying with it the scent of nicotine.

The boy brought the cigarette back to his lips, inhaling and exhaling again.

"Here," a man grunted, adjusting his pants while handing the other money.

"Thanks." the boy mumbled from behind his cigarette, taking the money and shuffling through it.

"Oh no, thank YOU." the elder of the two snorted and walked out of the alley. The younger scoffed and tossed his cigarette.

"Dick."

-xxx-

"Ash, come down for dinner!"

"Coming, mom!" Ash called. "Get _out _of here, Ritchie! My mom'll FLIP if she-mphh." Lips and a tongue that wasn't his covered Ash's mouth, and he easily submitted into it, purring as their tongues ran against one another's.

"Hey, hey," Ritchie giggled, "Wanna come over tomorrow? My parent's won't be home."

"Only if you give me two hundred and fifty bucks."

"Alright," Ritchie shrugged, "What time?"

"I dunno. Just call me."

"Ash? What's taking so long?"

"GO!" he hissed, pushing the brunette out the window. "Coming!" he made sure Ritchie was down the street before trotting down the stairs.

"There you are," his mother sighed. "What were you doing up there, anyway?"

"Homework." Ash responded, sitting down and politely waiting for his mom to do the same.

"Alright. Well, dig in, sweetie." she smiled sweetly at him as she sat down.

-xxx-

"Can I smoke in here?" Ash asked, looking back at Ritchie once he put his jeans back on.

"Open the window, though." Ritchie mumbled, gesturing towards said window. "Your money's in the nightstand."

"Thanks." Ash pulled out a cigarette and opened the window, lighting it and inhaling deeply.

"You've done this before, haven't you?" Ritchie asked, yawning afterwards.

"...Yeah." Ash tapped the end of the stick and rested his chin in a palm.

-xxx-

"Ash did you hear?"

"Whu-?" he looked back at the three girls who were gossiping, as usual.

"We hear a new kid from Pallet is coming to our school." Misty, the redhead, said while looking up at the boy.

"Yeah. Aren't you from Pallet?" May, the brunette, cocked her head in question.

"I heard he's gay!" Dawn, the dark-haired girl of the trio, piped up.

"Um, yeah, I'm from Pallet, but I don't think I'm gonna remember the ki-" Ash stopped mid-sentence when a brunette boy walked into the cafeteria. His eyes widened. "...Gary...?"

-xxx-

Ash stumbled over a discarded beer can, mumbling curses.

"Ash? Ash Ketchum?" a boy asked. Ash looked up and in a drunken haze, he grinned.

"Gary! Gary Oak!" he laughed loudly, wobbling over and collapsing into the brunette's arms. He muttered more curses, something about being "so fucking _hammered._"

"Ash, are you okay? What happened?"

"Went to a party...Had a couple shots of teh-keel-aaaahhhhh." Ash giggled drunkenly. "I betchya YOU'D like teh-keel-ah Gary. Taste iiiiit," he grabbed Gary's cheeks and pulled him down, forcing his tongue into the other's mouth.

"Apfh!" Gary pushed him away and coughed, wiping his mouth with his sleeve. "Dude, you're seriously drunk off your _ass._ I think I should take you home-"

"Take me HOME? What do you think I am, a PROSTITUTE?" Ash shouted, laughing afterwards. "Wellllll, you thought RIGHT," he hissed, grinning, "I sell myself in...that alley over there." he pointed, giggling again.

"Yeah, I'm DEFINATELY taking you home now. Just...sleep or something."

"Okey-dokey artichokey." he chuckled and let Gary pick him up bridal style, then found himself feeling nauseous. "W-Wait..."

"What? What is it?"

"I don't feel..." Ash swallowed thickly.

"Ah, fuck," Gary jogged into an alley, setting Ash down, and closed his eyes with a sigh when Ash emptied his stomach's contents onto the cold, unforgiving cement.

"Ugh..."

"You look like shit, Ketchum." he reached over into Ash's pockets, pulling out his cigarettes and lighter, lighting one and taking a drag.

"I...I'm sorry," Ash sobbed.

"S'okay."  
"Can...Can you take me home? Please?" he asked quietly, inhaling the nicotine in the air.

"Alright. Just don't barf on me." Gary threw the cigarette, picked up Ash again, and went to his house. He climbed up the latter near his window and laid Ash down, reaching into his pocket and pulling out his cellphone.

-xxx-

Ash awoke the next day in bed, a horrible headache pounding behind the soft flesh of his forehead. Then his phone buzzed with a new text message from a number he didn't recongize that read:

_good morning sunshine. meet me in your alley._

Ash's eyes widened, and he quickly threw on a hoodie, brushing his teeth and ignoring his mother's calls of "Where are you going, young man!? Did you change your underwear?! Come eat some breakfast right _now_!". He dashed out the door, running down the streets of Celadon, to his alley.

-xxx-

Ash stumbled in, head still pounding, and his eyes still wide, which went even wider when he saw Gary motherfucking _OAK _standing in _HIS _alley, smoking a cigarette.

"Hey there, Ashy-boy." Gary said with a smirk.

"G-Gary?! What are you doing here?! How do you know about this place? How did you get my NUMBER?!" Ash screamed.

"Yesterday we ran into each other while you were smashed. You said you sell yourself in this alley, and I took your phone and got your number." Gary explained, exhaling smoke into the air. "So, Mr. Ketchum." he smirked at him. "I'd like to buy you."

"E-E-Excuse me?!" Ash squeaked, blushing madly.

"I'd. Like. To. Buy. You." Gary repeated, slowly, holding up a few bills with a smirk. "We can go to my house." Ash stared, more money, another lay he needed, or so his brain told him.

"...Fine." Ash sighed. Gary grinned in victory.

-xxx-

Ash stepped into Gary's small house, boxes littering the living room.

Still moving in.

"My room's upstairs." Gary said, walking up said stairs. "C'mon." Ash shyly followed.

-xxx-

_"Hey Ash, c'mon! My room's upstairs."_

_"Okay Gary!" An eager 7 year old Ash followed his long time friend, Gary, upstairs to his room while his mom and Mr. Oak conversed.  
"Be nice, Ash!"_

_"I will, Mom! Geez..." Ash huffed and went into Gary's room, Gary shutting the door and giggling childishly.  
"Ash, check this out!" he gestured Ash to come over to his bed. Ash looked,_

_"What is it?"  
"Shh! Nobody knows about this, but I trust you, so I'm gonna show you, okay?"_

_"Okay! I promise, Gary! Promisepromisepromise!" _

_"Okay...Look what I found the other day," the brunette pulled out a red and white ball. "I found it underground when I was making mudpies."_

_"Whoa..." Ash stared in awe, brushing his tiny fingertips across the dirty metal. "It's gotta be like, a million years old!"  
"That's what I said! Isn't it cool?!" Gary said excitedly, a light blush going across his cheeks. "I knew you'd like it."_

_"Yeah, it's super cool, Gary! You're lucky." Ash pouted while admiring the old artifact. _

_"Maybe..." Gary tugged at both sides of the ball._

_"Gary, what are you doing?! You're gonna break it!" Ash hissed._

_"That's...the...POINT!" with a crack, the ball snapped in half._

_"G-Gary! What'd you do that for?!" Ash cried._

_"Well I did it so we could each have a piece. This one for me, this one for you!" he handed Ash the white half of the rusty ball and he stared at it in awe._

_"Wow..." he said breathlessly, "...Th-Thanks Gary..." _

-xxx-

How long ago had that been? Not very. That was the first time Ash started seeing Gary in a new light; his first crush.

All the old feelings he thought he bottled up were pouring out again: his admiration, the pain he felt when he had to move away.

Then everything clicked into place.

"Hey. You okay?" Gary asked. Ash blushed and looked away.

"Yeah. Everything's fine." he muttered.

"Well, come on then." the brunette reached over and tugged on Ash's hoodie, pulling it over his head. Ash blushed, feeling exposed with just a t-shirt on. "What's wrong? Aren't you used to stuff like this?" Gary smirked, playing with a lock of Ash's unruly hair.

"Y-Yeah, of course I am!...It's just..."

"Just what?"  
"It's you, Gary! I can't...I can't..." _I can't screw you then take your money._

"Ash, look at me." Ash turned away, clenching his eyes shut. "Ash."

"No!" Then warm lips pressed against his cheek. Ash blushed madly, looking at Gary, "Gary, what-?" then Gary pressed a slow, loving, dizzying kiss to his lips, and Ash almost fainted. "Mmmnn..."

Their bodies crushed against each other, Ash's happy whimpers and moans muffled behind Gary's lips.

"Gary..." he panted, burying his fingers into the other's brunette locks. "Gary, _please,_" Gary complied, lifting him up and going towards the bed.

Soon, everything was lost to the smacking of skin-on-skin, desperate moans, whimpers, screams, and sweat.

-xxx-

After that, the two laid side by side, smoking cigarettes.

"Hey Ash?"

"Yeah?" Ash looked over at the brunette.

"Do you still have it? Half of that weird ball thing?"  
"...Yeah. I've kept it everyday, Gary." he admitted.

"Good." Gary nodded.

They shared one more kiss before curling up in bed and sleeping the afternoon away.

-xxxxxxxxx-

Whew! Palletshipping oneshot DONE!

DID YOU LIKE HOW I THREW SOME LEAGUESHIPPING IN THERE.

Ok so like…I WANTED ASH TO SMOKE CIGARETTES AND BE A HOOKER, OK DON'T JUDGE ME.

I was addicted to Cobra Starship at the time.

So review! I always appreciate your input. :)


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